New Mom's wish list

If anyone told you that nothing prepares someone for childbirth and after, they are so True (in the upper case ‘T’). But I don’t know if anyone has told you how being a new Mom is also one of the most humbling of experiences. There I had in my arms a living, breathing and kicking little being so fragile, so completely dependent on you for their very existence and so completely in love with you.

When my little son Dhruv opened his eyes and looked at me as soon as he was born, the whole 39.5 weeks of my pregnancy flashed past my eyes, and suddenly it was all worth it. All the kicks and flutters of the past months now had a face, and a lovely one too. I never imagined that the smell of someone’s poop would be something I would so look forward to; in fact I almost like the smell now that I think of it (as gross as this sounds, it smells kinda like yogurt)

Now, this being my first time and me being a browsing freak, I did a lot of research looking out for stuff for the pregnancy, childbirth and after.

Here is a list of things that I wish I could have found :

1. Baby instruction manual & troubleshooting guide (to decipher his coos and cries)
2. Overgrown nail shedding mechanism (wish they came equipped with it)
3. A device that BF Moms could use to setup a timer for a nightly feed and it would pick up the baby, latch him on , switch sides and lay the baby down again without either one having to wake up
4. More hours in a day (especially the continuous sleeping ones)
5. A mute button to stop people from telling you to “sleep when the baby sleeps” because honestly, it is hard to sleep knowing that you will have to wake up in another couple of hours.
6. A backup back for Moms so the first one could take a break while the other one breaks.
7. Email alerts for teething, including information on the coordinates of the specific tooth and it’s ETA.
8. An appointment for shed-all-baby-fat (all new Moms would qualify after say 6-7 months). Dads could use it too, you know, for the sympathy belly.
9. Baby Gas Alarm System that would have a little LED that would blink red when the gas in his belly reaches the “uncomfortable” threshold. The little yellow button next to it is the de-gas-ifier (obviously!)
10. Diaper/nappy changing machine that would take the baby as an input and clean, dry and diaper him out. After having the baby though, I figured I didn’t really need this because I already have one: it is called the Dad !